A Real Problem
by WakkoRyan
Summary: Ryan creates a device that transports his mind to WakkoRyan's so he can enter the cartoon world. But not everything goes smoothly.
1. I Wonder If This Works

A Real Problem 

By WakkoRyan

A/N: I began writing this in July 2004 I think, so if you think it's a plot hole that WakkoRyan is just being introduced in this fanfic when he's already been in several by Carley (banjkazfan) then that's why.

**I Wonder If This Works:**

June 26, 2008: Log entry:

Today, I intend to test my personality transdimensionalizer implantation device for the first time. If it works properly, my mind will be transported to the drawing of WakkoRyan, and I will then be able to interact with the cast of Animaniacs via WakkoRyan.

Only time will tell if the device I set up to write the events in story format as they unfold will work. If it doesn't, I can always write the events down myself. Not that I'd want to after going through all this work to build the personality transdimensionalizer implantation device. I'd probably take about two years to finish if I need to do that.

Well, here goes nothing…

Ryan opened his eyes to discover he was standing in an empty room, looking towards a door. Looking back, he saw a portal that was like a black hole or something, but without pull (((A/N: you know what I mean.))) Through the portal, he saw himself, with some sort of helmet around his head with wires coming out and going to the computer. He was not alarmed to be looking at his unmoving (apparently unconscious) self, since he was easily able to identify the device on his head as the personality transdimensionalizer implantation device.

He went to a side room in the apparently abandoned house. He opened it to discover exactly what he had expected…a washroom, properly stocked unlike the rest of the barren house. Exactly the way it should have been considering he created it as part of the program for the personality transdimensionalizer implantation device. The program also included the results of any story he had written for He looked out the window to double-check that he was in the right place. He was happy to see the HOLLYWOOD sign in the distance. Much closer, just a few blocks away, he saw a familiar looking water tower, with the letters WB on the front.

He went to the mirror and looked at the image staring back. It was not Ryan. Well, it was, kind of. He saw his black hat, no surprise there. But the rest of him (except for his height of about 6'2½") was completely different. He weighed much less, but that's not important. The important difference is one that, if you haven't figured it out by now, would make you a complete idiot. He was a Warner. Well, the species Warner anyways, but unrelated to the sibs. He recognized the person staring back as his creation, WakkoRyan.

Other than his plain black hat (faced forward as is intended with baseball style caps, rather than backwards like his first-half-of-his-name namesake) and considerable comparative height, he had no other obvious characteristics that separated him from any other Warner, since he kept his deep-brown-almost-black, close-to-shoulder-length hair under his hat. He wore a smoky gray t-shirt and blue jeans that were just slightly too big, but not so big that he required a belt (((A/N: I'm not hangin' wit da homies in da crib, but I'm not a 70's rock star.))) As with most Warners, he wore no shoes. If age would have mattered in this place, and Wakko was seven as mentioned in a song on the show, WakkoRyan would be about 22 or so. Like all (well, most,) other Warners, he had the same red nose, black eyes, white face, and fur tufts at the cheeks. However, he tended to keep his tongue in his mouth most of the time unlike his namesake.

"I look so much better in real life than in a drawing," he said, and then laughed at the fact that he considered this real life. After all, he was just essentially using virtual reality. Little did he know, the connection was much more than that.


	2. Going To Cali, WakkoRyan Meets Warners

**Going To California, or WakkoRyan Meets The Warners:**

The Warners were sitting around in their pajamas, playing Nintendo (not Wii, (((A/N: oh my, what a dumb name for a game system))) or GameCube, or 64, they were playing the original Tetris.) Suddenly they heard a knock at the water tower door.

All three were stunned. "Huh?" said Yakko. "This is the second chapter. Normally in a WakkoRyan fanfic we don't have a major appearance until the fourth."

"Yeah," said Dot. "At least I could have put my dress on and taken out my hair curlers if I would have known we'd appear this early."

Looking back to Wakko to see if he had a comment to make, the other two Warner sibs noticed that he was already in his normal attire.

Yakko and Dot both took a breath and opened their mouths at the same time, but knowing what they were going to ask, Wakko simply said, "spinchange."

Yakko and Dot simultaneously said, "oh," and began to spinchange. But at the exact moment they began, the person at the door knocked again, startling them, and they ended up tripping and falling into each other, landing in a messy heap on the floor.

Wakko took the opportunity to answer the door, while Yakko and Dot properly spunchanged (((A/N: or is that spinchanged? Shut up Microsoft Word! They are totally words! Don't squigglyredline me! Gah! There is goes again, twice!)))

Considering the length of the author's rant, by this time WakkoRyan had already introduced himself and was in the water tower.

"Oh, there's no need to introduce yourself," said Dot, beginning to blush. "I do follow Carley's DeviantArt account, you know."

Knowing what she was referring to, WakkoRyan blushed too.

"Sorry Dot," he said, "but this is actually Ryan in WakkoRyan's body. You can call me WakkoRyan or WR or whatever, but I don't think we should be in a relationship. It wouldn't be right."

Dot looked a bit forlorn.

"Wait a minute," Yakko interjected. "You're WakkoRyan and at the same time you're the author? The author that barely gave me any lines?"

Wakko spoke, his voice verging on anger. "The author that gave me a near-death experience?" He reached for his mallet, but Dot intervened.

"Wait!" she said. "He may be the one that put us through all that trouble, but he's also the one who saved us."

Wakko and Yakko were still neutral, but not so angry.

Dot continued. "He's also the one that gave us our good friend Vakko. And Xakkharie!"

Yakko and Wakko beamed at the mention of the names of their friend and the nearly two-year-old baby of Xakko and Dottie that they cared for since he was less than a week old, because his parents were in jail.

"Alright," said Wakko, putting his mallet away. "Truce?"

"Truce," WakkoRyan agreed, shaking Wakko's hand. "Truce?" he said to Yakko.

"Truce." Yakko said, making this the fourth time in thirteen words that that word was used, or the fourth time in a row that it was spoken.

WakkoRyan couldn't help but make the motion of wiping sweat from his brow.

"Come on," said Yakko, motioning to the door. "Since this is your first time here, we'll show you around."

First off, Dot showed WakkoRyan her flower and shrubbery garden at the base of the water tower.

Then, Yakko showed WR Hello Nurse and Minerva, greeting them in a predictable way.

Wakko showed WakkoRyan something just a few blocks away that was opened just for Wakko himself. It was the new Faboo Times Two™ Ice Cream Company factory. Ryan, (((A/N: remember, it's me in WakkoRyan's body))) was confused since he hadn't written this into any of his stories, although he had created the brand name. Then again, he hadn't written about Dot's flower garden so he wasn't too concerned that the world he had created was making its own designs. (Well, at least it was his opinion that he was essentially using virtual reality…he still didn't know it was something more.)

Next, they visited ACME Labs just in time to catch Vakko at the end of his shift. Due to Ryan's background in Chemical Technology (((A/N: that's not fictional by the way,))) he got into a conversation about several of the projects on the go at the lab.

WakkoRyan was having lots of fun, so he suggested that maybe the whole group try to get some other cast members from Animaniacs together for a party at the water tower.

Ryan (or WakkoRyan or whatever…all the same right now) pointed out that since they were at ACME Labs, the first guests to look for should be Pinky and the Brain. Unfortunately, when they got to their cage, there was simply a note saying, "gone to take over the world." Well, so much for inviting them.

Next, they went to invite Slappy, Minerva, and even the Mime, but they were all out too.

"Oh well," WakkoRyan said, marking the first time in more than half a page that anyone had spoken. "A party with 5 people is still a party…especially when they are all Warners."

That night, the Warners set up the outside of the top of the tower with deck chairs and patio lanterns.

Luckily, they didn't have to worry about getting a babysitter for Xakkharie since he was being taken care of by Butter and hanging out with Remi. Of course, in WakkoRyan's body, Ryan was happy that some or most of the elements of some of his favorite fanfics existed in this universe that he had managed to enter. He kept wondering if maybe other FanFiction writers would show up ((A/N: I originally wrote a name there, but without her permission, I decided to be nonspecific.))) One of the only differences he had seen so far was that Butter lived on the other side of the country, where her creator Carley did. Ryan wondered if Carley and Butter both existed in this universe, but then he got to thinking about whether he did too in New Brunswick despite the fact that he was here in Burbank being represented by WakkoRyan, and whether WakkoRyan also existed here, and he got really confused, just like anyone who is reading this fairly long sentence and paragraph.

As the Warner sibs and Vakko were setting up for the party, WakkoRyan went out and bought some snacks. Climbing the ladder with one hand, and holding a case of root beer and a crate of party mix in the other, WakkoRyan lost his grip. Flailing so he wouldn't fall, he reached for the top platform right above the top rung. He managed to get a small cut from the platform, but it was too small to warrant any concern. Since he was wearing the same gloves that most Warners do, they acted like an automatic bandage to the wound that was smaller than even a paper cut. What WakkoRyan should have noticed was that since he was a toon, he should not have been able to be injured.


	3. An Unexpected Turn Of Events

**An Unexpected Turn Of Events:**

The party was well under way and everyone was having lots of fun.

Ryan was trying to gain a better understanding of the differences between this world and his fanfics. It still intrigued him that there were differences, since the world he entered should have only contained the parameters he specified: episodes and fanfics.

He asked Vakko, "what was it like having two minds in one?" trying to get Vakko's take on having Xakko in his head.

"Well," said Vakko, "that was pretty weird. And even after having his mind removed, I still have the occasional flash of anger if someone pisses me off…as if having his influence for so long changed something in my decision-making process."

Vakko was about to delve deeper into his thoughts about the subject, and looked up at the stars to collect his thoughts. He leaned on the railing of the water tower, which suddenly broke, causing him to fall into Dot's garden. WakkoRyan and the Warners laughed out loud, although Dot did not laugh quite as loud since one of her bushes had just been crushed.

"That looks like fun, Vakko! Maybe I'll do it later, too!" said WakkoRyan jestingly.

No response.

"Hey Vakko, you alright?"

No response.

The Warners looked at WakkoRyan, and WakkoRyan looked back, both sides with signs of concern on their faces. They raced down the ladder and arrived at Vakko's unmoving figure in the bushes. Yakko shook him slightly, which caused him to stir, with his blue eyes glazed and moving about unfocused in random directions. WakkoRyan helped Yakko get Vakko to a nearby wooden bench. He still appeared to be on the edge of consciousness, but barely.

"You two go and get Hello Nurse and Dr. Scratchansniff, and quickly!" said WakkoRyan to Wakko and Dot.

Wakko and Dot swiftly took off to do so.

Yakko and WakkoRyan briefly watched the two youngest sibs run toward the office. Little did they know, so was the toon sitting between them on the bench, out of the corner of his barely open eye.

Yakko and WakkoRyan returned their attention back to Vakko, who appeared to be coming to a bit more, but still had his eyes closed.

"What happened?" he said in a barely audible, groggy voice, his eyes remaining closed.

"You fell off of the water tower and landed on your head," said WakkoRyan. "We don't know how you actually got injured since you are a toon, but just stay put. Wakko and Dot are getting some help for you."

"I think I might know why I was injured," Vakko said, bent over with his hands over his face and his voice still shaky. "I can't think straight enough to put it in the right words, but basically you are real, so some stuff here is becoming real."

WakkoRyan considered the statement. "That is a possibility," he said. "Maybe it would be best if I left after we make sure Vakko is allright," he said to Yakko.

"Actually, you should leave immediately," Yakko said. "Since you created Vakko by writing about him, you can write a happy ending to this story. In fact, maybe you could write a way in that fixes this situation, so that you can come back again and nothing bad will happen!"

WakkoRyan marveled at Yakko's creative suggestion. "Wow, great idea!" he said. "I wonder if what is happening right now is coming up as printing on the screen…I guess there's only one way to find out."

WakkoRyan started to turn to go back to the portal hidden at 123 Fake Street, but Vakko stopped him.

"Wait!" he said, his voice still raspy. He continued to hold his hands over his face.

WakkoRyan came back and sat on the bench to the right of Vakko.

"Yes, Vakko?" he said.

"You agree that we can get injured like in the real world ?"

"Yes."

"And maybe even killed?"

"Maybe."

Vakko removed his hands from his face by rubbing them down his face, knocking his bangs into his face at the same time. He then opened his eyes and stared at WakkoRyan from a distance of just a few inches. His eyes were now red. "Just making sure."


	4. Real Consequences

_**Warning: violence, including blood. Not that you can see it anyways.**_

**Real Consequences:**

With a surge of adrenaline, Vakko ripped a piece of the wooden bench apart, the result being a large wooden stake in his right hand (((A/N: hmmm, I wrote this long before his ripping the arm off the chair in the last one and had forgotten about this.))) He swung at WakkoRyan, his intended target being the heart. The swing was perfectly aimed at the heart, and would have pierced it if not for Yakko. As the potentially deadly stake began its descent, Yakko reached for Vakko's arm. He did not manage to stop the arm's momentum, but deflected it enough so that it did not hit the heart. There was not much power taken off of the swing, though, and the stake drove deep into WakkoRyan's chest. His left lung was pierced and almost immediately collapsed.

Back in the real world, Ryan's unconscious body, sitting in a chair next to his computer, began to convulse. A patch of blood formed in the middle of his shirt.

Vakko ripped the stake back out of WakkoRyan's body, and turned to confront Yakko. Luckily, Yakko continued to be a quick thinker. He was already grabbing next to the area where Vakko had torn off the wooden stake, tearing off his own. As he leaned forward to swing at Vakko, Vakko jumped over WakkoRyan's motionless body and began to run away, holding onto his stake in case Yakko gave chase.

The real world body of Ryan fell sideways out of the chair, the personality transdimensionalizer implantation device being dislodged from his head.

Yakko decided that it was more important to stay with WakkoRyan than to chase after Vakko. Medical procedures were not quite as much use in the toon world, since injuries were virtually nonexistent, but he knew that applying pressure to wounds apparently helped to stop bleeding, and there was quite an amount of bleeding. He ripped off WakkoRyan's shirt to use for this action, since he didn't have a shirt of his own.

Blood began to drip from Ryan's mouth and form a pool on the floor.

At this time, the other Warner sibs came running into view with Dr. Scratchansniff and Hello Nurse.

"Where's Vakko?" said Wakko, not quite seeing the seriousness of the situation since the bench blocked his view, but knowing that it was WakkoRyan under Yakko due to the black hat.

"Forget him for now, I'll explain later," said Yakko. "We have a much more serious problem to deal with now."


	5. Entrapment

**Entrapment:**

It was nearly one week after the attack. WakkoRyan was in the hospital, and so was Ryan in the 'real' world. Luckily, a neighbor's dog had gotten off her leash and wandered into Ryan's back yard, and when the owner came to get the dog, he could see Ryan through the deck door.

The treatment of WakkoRyan was hampered by the fact that no one had his blood type, since he was 'real' (((A/N: you know what I mean, so I'm not going to bother using 'quotation' marks anymore,))) and when he became a toon a new type of blood was created. If he had bled any more, he may have died. The only way the potentially correct blood could have been collected would be from another person from the real world who came into the toon world. However, even if anyone would have wanted to attempt to contact the real world somehow, they (toons) did not know where the portal was – WakkoRyan hadn't told anyone in the interest of safety (mainly to prevent Brain from getting to the real world and potentially taking it over, to be honest.)

In the real world, the doctors had the correct blood to use to replace the blood that had mysteriously spewed from Ryan's mouth. They had gone about mending the lung that had somehow collapsed from a hole that appeared to have been made by a jagged object but had no splinters, rust, or any indication of direct contact in any way. They were confused to see that Ryan's brainwaves indicated that there was basically just enough brainpower to keep the blood pumping and the lungs working. He was declared brain dead, but did not die when the life support systems were taken offline.

"**_AAAAAAUGH!_**"

WakkoRyan awoke with a scream. Dot was the first to get to his side.

"_WHERE IS HE?_" WakkoRyan screamed. He then had a coughing fit.

"He ran away, it's okkay," said Dot in a gentle and caring voice.

"How long has it been?" WakkoRyan asked Dot, in a gruff voice.

"Six and a half days," she answered.

WakkoRyan's eyes became very wide. "OH NO!" he said. The shout caused a few more coughs. He then lowered his voice to a more normal level, but still rushed. "The portal I use to go between here and the real world can only stay open (cough, cough) on its own for a maximum of five days! (cough, cough) It's probably closed now, and I have no way (cough, cough) no way of opening it up!"

The Warners thought about the situation. They all came up with the potential solution to WakkoRyan's dilemma at the same time, giving each other knowing glances. Wakko and Dot ended up looking at Yakko.

"Okkay, I see, I'm the talker, so I have to tell him," Yakko said. "I deserve to since I didn't have enough lines in the last story!"

Wakko and Dot smiled and nodded.

"I love my job," said Yakko. Turning to WakkoRyan, he asked, "I assume you know who the Brain is?"


	6. One Brain Is Better Than None

**One Brain Is Better Than None:**

"…and he could kill any toon he wanted to!" Yakko finished telling Brain. "In fact, I'm surprised we haven't heard that he has already."

"Including you," said WakkoRyan from his wheelchair.

"I am fully aware of that possibility, WakkoRyan," said Brain.

"Just (cough) enforcing the point, Brain," WakkoRyan said.

"Indeed," said Brain sarcastically. He turned to the window and stared out for a few seconds to gather his thoughts. A thought crossed his mind. "Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?"

"I think so, Brain," Pinky said, "but what would we use to hold it in? Duct tape? Cement?"

Brain realized he had made his most common error for at least the one-hundredth time – asking Pinky that question – but he was intrigued by Pinky's comments. "Hold what in, Pinky?" he said.

"The polka dots, NARF!"

Brain quickly lost interest. "Never mind, Pinky." Turning back to WakkoRyan, he said, "I may be able to help you, but some sort of – ahem – payment – "

"Yeah, yeah, yeah…" said WakkoRyan. "What do you want?"

"You can change our world by writing your stories, correct?"

"Yes."

"Make me _ruler of the WORLD_!"

WakkoRyan chuckled, and then had to stifle a few coughs because of it. "I can't do that!"

"Well, then – maybe I can't help you."

WakkoRyan knew he had to reach a compromise. "I'll write a storyline where you can be ruler of the world for one – ONE – week. That's (cough, cough) that's it. You can have fun for one week, (cough) which is more than most can say."

"Two weeks," said Brain.

"Ten days," said WakkoRyan.

"Agreed," said Brain. "Now let's get to work. Pinky, bring me my notebook. The green one."

"Oh, you mean the silly-willy colouring book that has pictures of blue lines all over?"

Brain glared at Pinky. "You coloured in it?"

"I sure did, Brain! And my pictures are really funny and colurful. NARF!"

"In that case," said Brain, trying his best to hide the fact that his eye was beginning to twitch, "just get a new one from the storage room."

"Right-o, Brain," Pinky said. "Come on Warners! I'll show you my silly-willy colouring book on the way! POIT!"

"Faboo!" said Wakko. "Do you like drawing anvils and mallets and pizza, too?"

Brain could do nothing but roll his eyes.


	7. Trust In Computers – Good or Bad Idea?

A/N: Typing Ryan/WakkoRyan's cough is annoying already. Just like with Vakko's accent, you're just going to have to imagine it. Putting Trust In Computers – Not Something I Usually Do! 

"You came in through a computer, correct?" Brain asked WakkoRyan.

"That's right," said WakkoRyan. "I used a personality transdimensionalizer implantation portal to transfer my mind to the body I'm in right now."

"Then by logic, we would use a computer to get you back to the real world." Brain walked over to a nearby computer and turned it on.

"Good point. But how do we link this world with the real world?"

"With technology similar to that which got you here. We don't have the elements to create a portal in the same way that you described to me, but we could send brief data bundles to a known location, perhaps two, and accept data bundles. It just has to be to someone you trust, because they will have to manually participate in transferring you, in the form of data, to your real body. If your real body is still alive."

WakkoRyan shuddered at the possibility that he could now exist solely in toon form. "And who is to say that my body isn't perfectly fine?"

"It has been a week," Brain said. "If no one came to visit, you would have starved by now. Besides, my theory is that your body, Ryan, suffered the same injuries that you, WakkoRyan, suffered in this world."

"Great, just great," WakkoRyan said, rolling his eyes and extending his arms outwards in an exasperated gesture. After a brief pause to fight off the urge to cough again, he said, "so, about that data transfer…could that be done so that it is sent to an instant messenger?"

"Precisely. We may even be able to carry two conversations at once. Allow me a minute to do some calculations."

After fifty-eight seconds, Yakko said, "it's been a minute…nnnow! So, Brain what is the answer?"

"The answer is that you are an idiot. There are several questions that may lead to that answer."

WakkoRyan couldn't help but smile, and he thought he saw Wakko and Dot stifling giggles out of the corner of his eye.

"There we are…I'm ready to enter the information for the recipient or recipients," Brain said.

"Okkay…I think Carley is the only one that will believe me."

"Go ahead," said Brain. "She is online."


	8. Bridging the Gap

**A/N: I just got a new computer, and it doesn't have Word...came with WordPerfect...so hopefully this document loads correctly.**

**Bridging The Gap:**

Ryan looked at the screen. Carley's first message came up.

**Carley says:**

oh my deity, Ryan!

**Carley says:**

your Mom sent me an email telling me that you were in the hospital…I'm so happy that you're finally awake!

**Ryan says:**

actually, I'm not awake, I'm still in the cartoon world

**Carley says:**

O.o

**Carley says:**

what?

**Carley says:**

I think you should get some rest until the drugs wear off, Ryan

**Ryan says:**

no really, my body is still unconscious, but my mind is in the cartoon world. I created a device that can transport one's mind to the cartoon world via a host toon (in this case WakkoRyan) but I got injured and somehow that affected my real body too!

**Carley says:**

I'm sorry, but you should sign off, Ryan. You need more sleep.

**Carley says:**

bye for now

**Ryan says:**

wait!

**Carley says:**

what now?

**Ryan says:**

Brain is about to get a video linkup…that way I can prove to you that I'm trapped in the cartoon world!

**Carley says:**

this isn't funny, Ryan

**Ryan says:**

invites Carley to a video linkup 

(((A/N: I have no idea what it really says when you do that since I don't have a webcam.)))

**Carley says:**

Carley has accepted the video linkup 

(((A/N: I'd like to take this opportunity to remind you all that Ryan and WakkoRyan are the same in this case and I'll switch back and forth at will just to confuse you all…I've got to do a story where there isn't a case of someone being in someone else's body one of these days.)))

The video feed began to display on Carley's computer. It showed WakkoRyan, with Brain and Pinky on his shoulders (((A/N: does it matter who is on each shoulder?))) with the sibs in the background.

Carley looked surprised, but her response was not what Ryan was expecting.

"You finally drew another picture!" she said. "And it looks great!"

Ryan rolled his eyes and sighed frustratingly. Brain smacked his forehead. Yakko started muttering about not having a speaking line in this scene.

Upon seeing the movement, Carley said, "an animation! The movements are _sooo_ fluid, too!"

WakkoRyan interjected, "this isn't a flash animation or something Carley!"

After seeing him respond to her comment, Carley noted, "oh, is this like one of those things where you put motion sensors all over your body and it makes the cartoon move?"

WakkoRyan had to try very hard to resist the urge to rip his hair out.

(((A/N: Carley isn't actually this dense, it just wouldn't make a semi-believable story if she just immediately believed me.)))

Ryan was beginning to wonder if he would ever be able to get the point across to Carley, when something occurred to him.

"Carley," he said. "If this is a program of some sort, surely you must know that I couldn't have created it while in the hospital, right?"

"I suppose," she said.

"So I would be based on how I appeared before entering the hospital, right?"

"Um, sure…"

"But I'm in a wheelchair."

"You are?"

Yakko reached over WakkoRyan and adjusted the camera to point slightly lower, showing Carley that WR was indeed in a wheelchair.

"And just in case you still don't believe," Ryan said, "look at this."

He lifted his shirt, showing the bandages over the affected area. Grimacing, he began to lift the bandages to show Carley the wound, but Carley stopped him from doing so.

"Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait!" she said. "I believe you now! You don't have to show me that disgusting wound to prove to me that you really are somehow in the cartoon world."

"_Finally!_" all of the cartoon members of the conversation (including WakkoRyan) said in unison.

Now that he had Carley convinced, Ryan told her the story of how he entered the cartoon world, and how he came to be injured.

"That's awful that Vakko is still apparently affected by Xakko," Carley said after Ryan was finished. "Hopefully you can find a way to get him back to normal for good."

"Well," said Ryan, "we have to find him first. After stabbing me, he just ran off, and no one we know has seen him since then."

"Regardless," said Brain, "we must begin preparations to return Ryan's mind to his body. I believe I have devised a way to do so that will work sufficiently. Let us be prompt so that I may shortly begin my ten days of RULING THE WORLD!"

Carley was quite confused.

Ryan began to explain. "I promised Brain that if he helped, I'd write a story about him ruling the world for ten days. Since my writing affects this world…"

Ryan's sentence was interrupted by the sound of an opening door. Carley couldn't see what was going on, but saw the immediate shock on the faces of all of the toons as they looked off-screen.

"What's going on?" she said.

The sound of fear in Ryan's voice was evident.

"_It's Vakko_."


	9. Interim

**Interim:**

Vakko stepped into the room, forgetfully leaving the door open.

Wakko pulled out his mallet and Yakko pulled out his two paddleballs. Realizing how useless they'd be in a fight, he put them back in his pockets and pulled out a mallet as well.

Yakko opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by Vakko.

"Whoa, wait a minute," Vakko said, holding his hands in front of him in a defensive manner.

"Don't you 'wait a minute' me," Yakko said. "You just interrupted the first line I've had in quite a while!"

"Uhhh...good point. I'll buy you an ice cream sundae later or something."

Wakko continued to look menacing.

"...And a big bucket of ice cream for you," Vakko said to Wakko. "...And a jar of caramel."

Wakko looked less menacing, but kept his mallet raised.

Carley couldn't see what was going on, just the back of WakkoRyan's head. "Hello?" she said, but was unintentionally ignored.

"Anyways," Vakko said, "what I was about to say was that I'm not here to hurt you or anything...I didn't even mean to in the first place!"

WakkoRyan angrily lifted his shirt. "Well, this _wound_ feels pretty real."

"What I mean is that I couldn't control myself. For the first few hours after I fell off the tower, I couldn't even remember what happened! And I think I'm still missing pieces of my memory from that night. I don't know how I got from the tower to the forest where I hid out. Once I realized what happened, I found out what hospital you were taken to and snuck around there for a bit...I followed you here but didn't appear to you until now because I knew that I wouldn't be welcome, so I was apprehensive."

Ryan had trouble forgiving Vakko. "Oh yeah, _you're_ the apprehensive one now."

"Yes. Yes I am."

"Well, aren't _we _just the best at detecting sarcasm."

"Maybe _you _are, but _I'm _not."

"Well said."

(((A/N: wow, that's a _lot _of italicized words right there...hopefully they show up.)))

Yakko decided he had been silent long enough. "How do we know we can trust you?" he said.

"Well, you can't, really," Vakko said.

Brain lifted an eyebrow. "Your honesty is impressive, but not comforting."

Carley once again tried to interject. "The microphone isn't picking up anyone but Ryan for me...what's going on? Hello?"

The sound of the wind was interfering with what Carley could hear the people in the room say, and also distorted the sound of her voice entering Ryan's ears to the point where he couldn't discern that he was being spoken to.

Carley realized that she couldn't be heard, so she just typed 'brb' and left the computer to go and make mini pizzas and iced tea...from scratch.

In the meantime, WakkoRyan had continued on with the conversation.

"So, if we can't trust you, but you're not here to hurt us, why are you here?"

"I need help," Vakko said. "And Brain here may be my best option. In terms of spells, that guy from Witches, Doctors, and Witchdoctors is borderline evil and also somewhat incompetent. And in terms of p-sychology..."

"You got Scratchy," WakkoRyan finished. "Good point about a bad idea."

"So, Brain," said Vakko, " will you help me?"

"It depends," Brain said. "I may need some persuasion." Looking at Ryan, he said, "perhaps five more days of persuasion."

"Alright, alright..." said Ryan. "Fifteen days of world rule it is. You drive a hard bargain, Brain."

Pinky interjected. "Wait. I thought you drove a Toyota Corolla, Brain."

Wakko, who had remained silent for quite some time, took the opportunity to do a rimshot.

Pinky looked confused, but that was no surprise.

Brain continued. "Now that we have my, ahem, 'payment' increased, I believe I can help you. But for now, it would appear that the more important task is to get Ryan's mind back to his body. Since you yourself said that we can't trust you, we must restrain you for the interim."

(((A/N: Yeah, there's predictable jokes about bondage to make here. Use your imagination.)))

"Oh, boy!" said Dot. "I _like_ tying people up!"

Yakko's expression became shocked. Looking at the fanficiton audience, he said, _"goodnight everybody!"_ then blew a kiss and waved.

(((A/N: You just couldn't let that opportunity slip away, eh Dot?)))

"Nope!"

(((A/N: Good answer.)))

"Thanks," she said cutely.

By this time, Dot and Yakko had their hands in Wakko's gag bag or wakky sak or whatever you want to call it, searching for rope while Wakko held it open.

Pinky went over to the door to finally close it (((A/N: he used a forklift))) while Brain went to the computer.

"We must begin preparations for the return of your body to your mind, Ryan," Brain said.

Looking at the computer screen, he and Ryan saw an empty couch.

"Carley? _Carley!_" Ryan called out.

Carley could be heard in the background. "Now where did that cheese shredder go? And for that matter, the cheese?"

In the meantime, the sibs were tying up Vakko.

"Be careful not to tie me up too tightly," Vakko said.

"Sorry," Yakko said. "We gotta protect ourselves." He then pulled the rope tight, giving Vakko a bit of a rope burn.

Vakko yelped. "_Aaargh! What the hell?"_ His eyes turned lavender.

Wakko got out a roll of duct tape, and ran the entire length around Vakko's torso in about 1.27 seconds.

"_GODDAMMIT, DO YOU REALIZE HOW PAINFUL IT'S GOING TO BE TO GET THIS DUCT TAPE OFF OF MY ARM FUR?"_ His eyes were deep purple (((A/N: or should I capitalize Deep Purple..._smooooke on the waaater / and fi-re in the sky-y_...anyways, back to the story.)))

Wakko appeared deep in thought. "No, I don't really know how painful that'd be...but if you think it'd be painful, I can start removing it right now so you don't have to worry about it later."

Wakko reached for the duct tape, and before Vakko could yell to stop him, had quickly unraveled a foot-long piece.

Vakko freaked out, and by this time his eyes were glowing red. **_"AAARGHH! YOU ASSHOLE! YOU STUPID MOTHERF-"_**

Dot interrupted him. "Now, now...no need to be angry." She kissed the location of his 'boo-boo.' "My brother didn't mean to be mean. _Pleeease _forgive him." She said the last part with her special wet cute eyes.

Vakko's eyes began to change back to Deep Purple, lavender, and then to blue. He looked at Wakko and genuinely apologized. "Sorry Wakko. And thank you Dot."

"No prob!" Dot said.

Vakko spoke loud enough for everyone in the room to hear. "Well, you can see now what I mean by not being able to control myself."

"Indeed," Brain (who was still at the computer) said. "And I'll get to work on fixing that sometime, but as of now I have Carley back at the computer, and we are ready for the transfer."


	10. Transdimensionalizer REimplantation

**The Personality Transdimensionalizer _Re-_implantation Device:**

Brain pointed Ryan to a chamber sitting next to the computer. "That is the personality transdimensionalizer _re-_implantation device. Enter so we may begin."

Ryan was perplexed. "How did you build that so fast...and why didn't I hear you bulding it?"

"Well, Pinky helped me...but the most important factor is that this is a cartoon."

"Ah, good point...plot holes and quick work."

"Indeed."

"Still doesn't answer my question about the sound."

Brain didn't see any reason to reply with anything but a shrug.

"So what's going to happen here?"

"_After you step inside..._" Brain said, trying to usher Ryan into the device, "a process similar to that which brought you here will occur. However, since the host body is not present on the other end, the transfer will not be completed in the same way."

"True," Ryan said. "It's not a direct transfer this time. So it's going to be a transfer to Carley's computer, and she'll have to complete the transfer at my body in the hospital."

"Precisely," Brain said, trying to get Ryan closer to the personality transdimensionalizer _re-_implantation device by pushing on his heel, to no avail since Ryan couldn't even feel the push.

Carley saw Brain's actions on her webcam and spoke up. "Come on, hurry up. It's going to take me long enough to get this file all the way up to the hospital Ryan's at. I'd like to sleep sometime this week."

"Sorry, sis," Ryan said, stepping into the device.

Brain closed the hatch and then spoke to Carley. "Are you ready for the transfer? He said.

"Uh, yeah," Carley said, rolling her eyes. "I have Messenger open, that's pretty much all I need."

"No need to be rude," Brain said, his feelings hurt.

Inside the personality transdimensionalizer _re-_implantation device, WakkoRyan was laughing his head off. It was quite the experience, feeling his head fall off. Friggin' visual gags.

WakkoRyan replaced his head and motioned to Brain and Carley to begin (((A/N: obviously, this chamber is glass or plexiglass or whatever...it's clear.)))

Brain typed some commands at the keyboard, and the device began to warm up. (((A/N: you know the generic sound...like a huge fan or generator slowly warming up.)))

After the device got to full power, Brain gave it the command to commence without further delay.

A bright, greenish light basked the sibs, who were next to the device playing cards since they are Vakko didn't have a part in this chapter, in a warm glow.

The progress bar shown on each of the computers began to move...1...2...

At first, it appeared as though nothing was happening, but Ryan appeared to be frozen in place. The sibs tapped on the glass, trying to get Ryan's attention, but he didn't move.

As the data transfer progressed further, it became apparent that something was actually happening...WakkoRyan was fading.

The progress bar continued, sometimes quicker and sometimes slower, until it got to 65. Then it suddenly stalled.

Brain said to Carley, "I cannot determine what is causing this pause in the transfer. Do you know the reason?"

Carley's image on the webcam feed was frozen as well.

Thinking that there was a problem with the webcam, Brain sent a text message instead, asking the same question.

A moment later, it came back, saying that the message could not be sent. Brain looked to the top of the window. It said that Carley was offline.

"Oh, no!" Brain said. "I think Carley's computer crashed, and Ryan's data is only partially sent!"


	11. The Small Part

**The Small Part:**

_Last time:_

"Oh, no!" Brain said. "I think Carley's computer crashed, and Ryan's data is only partially sent!"

_This time:_

Carley has signed on (((A/N: or whatever it says.)))

"Whoops!" Carley said, her video feed once again coming through. "I tripped over the power cord." (((I would like to reiterate that Carley isn't this dense...but she is this klutzy :P)))

The toons were still holding their hands over their mouths, with wide eyes.

"Could you try and send that file again?" she continued.

"That file is Ryan!" Yakko said.

"...And?"

"Only part of him is sent!" Wakko said.

Carley didn't comprehend why the toons were so shocked. "So? The file must be saved on my computer..."

Carley then quickly looked at her Received Files, and saw that the partial file was indeed there.

"Yes, it's here...so just send the rest."

Brain spoke. "I don't believe that you comprehend our apprehension. If you look behind us, you can see that the image of WakkoRyan has faded..." And indeed that is what Carley saw... "Only part of him was sent. We can send the rest, but the transfer to Ryan's empty-minded body may not be successful if the complete, undivided quantity of data is not present!"

"Well," Carley said. "What are you going to do then? Just leave him like this? At least I'm trying something!"

The toons began to understand her point.

"Alright," Brain said. "Let's send the other portion. She's right...we can't give up."


	12. Better Late Than Never

Of course, the last line in the previous chapter was "...we can't give up." And then I gave up for months on end. Oops. Many apologies. Well, two apologies at least.

Hopefully I can update more soon, but in the meantime here's a very, very short Christmas present.

**Better Late Than Never:**

So anyways, the transfer of data for the remaining portion of Ryan took place without a hitch. I don't feel like typing out a description of that.

So Carley now had two files on her laptop. Apparently it took months for the transfer of the second file to take place.

Since it took so long, the Warner sibs, Vakko, Pinky, and the Brain had left the room long ago. Vakko had to be locked in a room in case he freaked out again (which of course made him freak out.) While the transfer was taking place, Brain started working on a formula to use to control Vakko (((A/N: considering it's been so long, here's a reminder: his instability is caused by residual remnants of Xakko's evil side, from when Xakko's mind was transferred to his.)))

Carley left as soon as the transfer was done...and she had finished her homework...and had some Ramen and iced tea.

Carley's only method of transportation was her bicycle. Not the fastest mode of transportation. "Meh, better late than never" she thought.


	13. Plot Hole?

**Plot Hole?:**

Carley got on her bike (((A/N: that is, bicycle...not scooter or motorcycle...))) She knew it was going to be a long trip, so she brought food and drink in her backpack (((A/N: dont worry how heavy it was, or what it was, it doesnt matter whether it would slow her down or whether she would have to cook it.)))

She had been biking for about half an hour when she came around a bend an noticed a sign on the side of the road: WELCOME TO MAINE.

Carley skidded to a stop. She looked at the sign with a puzzled look on her face. AHow did I get here so quickly? she wondered out loud.

(((A/N: she doesnt live in Vermont or New Hampshire.)))

AThis has got to be some joke, she muttered out loud. AI hope they arrest the people that put up this false sign.

Looking backwards, she saw another sign: WELCOME TO NEW HAMPSHIRE.

AAt least theyre thorough, she muttered, rolling her eyes. AIts not like I just encountered a plot hole in real life.

She got back on the bike and continued on.


	14. The OddestLooking Cat You’ve Ever Seen

(((A/N: Sorry for the short update in the previous chapter. I just couldn't find a good cutting point. Here's a much longer one.)))

**The Oddest-Looking Cat You've Ever Seen:**

About five minutes down the road, Carley came upon a sign welcoming her to Portland, Maine. Another five minutes brought her to Augusta, and then Bangor five minutes after that.

Carley began to wonder how there were so many fake signs that were put in place as a prank that had not been removed by the authorities yet. Sure, every time she saw these signs, there appeared to be cities in the distance that disappeared a minute later, but she was convinced this was just the same city, disappearing behind trees every few minutes.

She began to realize something was up about two minutes after passing the sign for Calais. She came upon what appeared to be a border crossing, with the Stars and Stripes right next to the Canadian flag. Taking a map out of her backpack, she noticed that Calais was indeed a border town, crossing to St. Stephen, New Brunswick. She saw that the name of the river identified on the bridge to the border crossing was the St. Croix, the same as on the map.

Carley thought out loud, Ait would probably be pretty difficult to make a fake border crossing right in the middle of a main road. She put the kickstand down on her bike and leaned against it. "So if Ive actually encountered a plot hole, how did that happen?"

As Carley pondered what she was pondering, movement in her peripheral vision caught her attention. She turned toward the distraction, and almost returned to her previous gaze when her first glance identified it as just a cat, but turned back when her subconscious processed the information and pointed out an important fact.

"Since when do cats have blue and yellow fur?" she said out loud.

Since the cat was on a sidewalk about 100 feet away, Carley thought she must be having an optical illusion, but taking a closer look at the cat confirmed the colours. Aside from what appeared to be black, there were indeed blue and yellow regions on the cat. She could swear that one of the yellow markings formed a crescent shape, reminiscent of a moon, but in her mind this was surely just a coincidence.

Regardless, the first thought that came to her mind was, "that has to be the oddest-looking cat Ive ever seen."

Suddenly, a huge dog with a spiked collar (((A/N: pick your least favorite breed…unless that's a Chihuahua))) appeared from behind a bush and began running toward the odd-looking cat. Even more oddly, the cat didn't appear fazed, and stood still. Carley saw that the cat actually looked rather bored, and even rolled her eyes. But Carley was too concerned to care, since she felt that she was about to see a cat mauled to death by a dog because it was apparently too stupid or clueless to run.

"Oh, no!" she said. "That poor kitty is going to get mauled!" reiterating the previous paragraph's description of thought.

As the dog approached, the cat reared up on her hind legs and reached behind her back. Of course, cats can't reach behind their backs with their front paws, a fact that wasn't lost on Carley.

The dog jumped into the air a few feet before the cat, its jaws open, snarling, and drooling. The cat raised her arms (((A/N: or, front legs?))) above her head to abruptly reveal a wooden mallet much larger than her size, which she used to bash the dog in the head, immediately rendering it unconscious.

Carley started wondering what could possibly have been in the iced tea she drank earlier.

The cat put her hands back behind her back, and when the reemerged, the mallet was gone. She moved toward the dog, still on her hind legs as if she was bipedal. She leaned against the dog, reached behind her back again with one hand, and produced a nail file out of thin air. She then, of course, began to sharpen her nails, simply because this is one of the things that toons do after defeating a villain. Carley swore she saw and heard the cat nonchalantly whistling as well.

The black, blue, and yellow cat looked up at Carley and casually waved hello. That was enough to break Carley's near-trance, and she bolted in the other direction.


	15. Crossroads, or, Break On Through

**Crossroads, or, Break On Through To The Other Side:**

Once Carley got to the St. Croix River's border banks, she sat down on a rock and began to ponder again, in view of her previous pondering being interrupted. Considering it wasn't all that long ago that she was contacted by a cartoon version of Ryan, she was much more open to accepting apparent impossibility as fact than she normally would have been.

She grabbed a sheet of paper and made a list of things that had happened recently that were out of the ordinary. But her attention was diverted, and she started absentmindedly doodling on the edge of the sheet. Luckily, she quickly realized she needed to get back to the important task of pondering.

Anyways, the three main oddnesses (((A/N: Word is redscribblylining me again))) were: Ryan contacting her as WakkoRyan, apparently traveling hundreds or thousands of miles per hour (she didn't feel like doing the math for the distance over time for her trip,) and cartoon characters apparently entering the real world.

Considering that the apparent fast travel could be considered a plot hole, she came to realize that the common bond was cartoon or fanfiction stuff in the real world. She wondered if all of these elements came through when she had the link to WakkoRyan, et al, or if they continued to come through at this moment.

Carley stood up, knowing that she could probably think about these things while continuing on to the hospital that Ryan was in. Then it occurred to her: how was she going to get across the border crossing on a bike, anyways? (((A/N: Truth be told, you probably could…they let a guy into the U.S. from Canada with a bloody chainsaw, after all.)))

She looked down at the river, and saw that there was an aluminium boat sitting there. Well, at least that answered the question about whether or not plot holes were still occurring.

She rolled her eyes and sighed at the predictability, but shrugged and got in.


	16. Awakening

(((A/N: Carley reminded me yesterday that it's been SIX MONTHS since I've updated. When I looked at this, I was surprised that I hadn't posted this chapter yet. I was going to wait until I finished writing the entire story, but it's slow going, so I'll post this…maybe that will encourage me to write some more soon. Actually, I dorkily kinda almost inserted the screenname(s) of a FanFiction/DeviantArt user somewhere in this chapter…if anyone figures it out, I'll post another chapter in a week.)))

**Awakening:**

(((A/N: Hopefully that chapter title has a double-meaning, and it's also an awakening for me to write more.)))

Later that day (seven minutes later, actually,) Carley arrived at the hospital. She just rode over a hill and there it was.

She walked into the hospital and over to the elevator (((A/N: why she didn't ask the receptionist what room to go to is beyond me…I guess I just like plot holes.))) She chose a random floor. She walked past the blood donation clinic, admiring the angels that were giving blood, and the nurses that were tweaking with the process. "There must be like 515 people in there," she thought. Anyways, she went to a random room. Of course you know, the first one she chose was Ryan's room.

Carley sat in a chair next to the bed and turned on her laptop. She opened an instant message window to the Brain. Obviously, he was surprised that she had arrived at the hospital so quickly (((A/N: but I can't think of a funny exchange there.)))

Brain sent a file to use to open a portal to transfer the files on Carley's computer to Ryan's body. (((A/N: This would be a version of the Personality Transdimensionalizer Re-implantation Device, I guess.))) It was an easy-to-use program – just open the program and tell it what file you wanted transferred. Brain had obviously thought this through.

Carley told the program what file she wanted transferred and sat back while the transfer took place (((A/N: there was a black hole and a rainbow or something…use your imagination, because I don't feel like doing so.)))

After about 2.7 minutes, the file was finished transferring.

Then Carley sat and waited. She twiddled her thumbs and stared at a stain on a ceiling tile. Then she realized that after the file transfer, Ryan would still be asleep. She needed to gently wake him up.

So she slapped him in the face.

"WAKE UP, YOU LAZYASS!" she shouted.

Ryan came to, and after taking a moment to become aware of his surroundings, opened his mouth to speak. Certainly, it was going to be something important, considering the situation. Something Earth-shattering. Intelligent. Maybe poetic.

"_**Purplemunkydishwasher!"**_

Nothing out of the ordinary there.

"_**Blagrafgglefragt. Spagt! BANKPRTZ! Andtfrutz."**_

Alright. Maybe something a _bit_ wrong.

Carley still had her connection to the Brain open, so he heard this exchange.

"Carley, it appears as though Ryan's behavior is quite erratic," he said. "Did you complete the transfer of both files before waking him?"

Carley had a brief look of confusion on her face, followed by realization. "_Both_ files? Oops. Sorry, Brain, I forgot that he transferred in two parts. I'll transfer the other file as soon as I find it."

Good thing Carley couldn't see the Brain at the moment, because he looked pretty peeved. "I have half a mind to hurt you when I next see you, Carley," he said.

"And Ryan only has half a mind, too!" Pinky pointed out.

Brain pointed out, "although that is true, and moderately funny, at least he _has_ half a mind, Pinky."

"Oh…right, Brain." Pinky had no reason to disagree with that statement.

Carley continued to look for the file. "Let's see, it's not in Received Files…not on my desktop…"

It took her five minutes, but she finally found it. For some reason, it was in her music file, with some crappy country songs. Good job of keeping a tidy computer, C.

Carley transferred the second file, and Ryan started speaking coherently (((A/N: relatively speaking.)))

Ryan and Carley agreed that it was weird to meet this way. After C explained to Ryan what happened, they both decided not to waste any time. They needed to go to his house immediately to research what would have caused the leak between the real world and the toon world.

The thing is, neither one had any money for a cab.

Well, at least they had Carley's bike.


	17. Leaves

(((A/N: …I couldn't wait a week. :P )))

**Leaves:**

Immediately after disconnecting himself from the IV and catheter (ouch!) Ryan walked out of the hospital with Carley (((A/N: believe me, in Saint John you could probably do that without anybody stopping you insisting you stay, or at least properly check out))) and headed to Ryan's house to see if they could determine the cause of the unusual toon-related occurrences as of late.

"Considering how I entered the toon world," Ryan said to Carley, "it's likely that this is somehow related to the Personality Transdimensioaln, uh, sloan-mezmerizer…uhh, that portal thingy that I invented, but have trouble saying."

On their way, Ryan got to experience some plot holes firsthand. First, he was able to fit into the basket on the front of Carley's bike effortlessly, and Carley was able to pedal the bike with Ryan in the basket effortlessly as well. Add the fact that there wasn't a basket on the bike when Carley left her house, and you have yourself a big plot hole. That, and Ryan's house was right around the corner instead of somewhere around five to ten kilometers away.

Even though they only had to go around a corner to get to Ryan's house, this was time enough to see that even the scenery was changing. Random birds, and even trees, had taken on a somewhat toonish colour and shape. (((A/N: Hopefully you remember the plot; it has been a while.)))

Looking into the forest, Ryan and Carley saw a toon deer that somehow looked familiar. Suddenly, a shot rang out and the deer collapsed to the ground. Ryan and Carley expressed surprise when they saw the hunter. Looking at each other, they said in union, "did we just see Elmer Fudd shoot Bambi's Mom?"

The event was confirmed, and made more bizarre, with the sudden appearance of a young brown toon squirrel, who pointed at the aforementioned scene and began to cry uncontrollably. He was quickly joined by an older grey toon squirrel, who grabbed his wrist and began to drag him away from the scene. "Great," she muttered sarcastically. "I get to put up with _this_ again." (((A/N: Either you get the reference or you don't.)))

So anyways, they went around the corner and arrived at Ryan's house in an anticlimactic end to the chapter.


	18. Visitors

Thanks to Moonie for prodding me! Hopefully I'll finish this someday, but here's one chapter for now. Happy birthday Moonie!

**Visitors:**

Luckily, no-one else was home at Ryan's house, allowing the author the advantage of not having to write additional dialogue or introduce new characters that quite frankly don't matter at all.

Ryan and Carley entered the house and headed to the room that contained the Personality Transdimensionalizer Implantation Device, lots of computers, many flasks with randomly-coloured boiling liquids, body parts floating in formaldehyde, and a Jacob's Ladder just because they're cool.

As Ryan went to open the door to the room, he noticed it was ajar. As he reached to push it the rest of the way open, a blur suddenly shot by into the hallway. Once the entity stopped moving, it didn't take him long to determine the identity of the familiar toon - the Roadrunner. A few seconds later, another familiar face pushed his way past Ryan and Carley, nearly knocking them over in the process. If you didn't realize it was going to be Wile E. Coyote after reading the previous sentence, there's something wrong with you. (((A/N: In fact, there probably is something wrong with you anyways, but that's okkay, I still love you. I have no taste, but I love you.)))

Wile E. reached behind his back, and from thin air (((A/N: or would it be thick air?))) pulled out a bow and quickly duct-taped a stick of dynamite to an arrow. Meanwhile, the Roadrunner simply stood at the end of the hallway, cocking his head inquisitively. Our favorite hapless coyote lit the fuse. However, when he attempted to shoot the arrow at the Roadrunner, it was he who was shot – backwards and through a wall into the neighbor's yard.

Considering toon physics were at play, the lit stick of dynamite hung in mid-air exactly where it had begun its journey from the bow. Ryan and Carley both frantically grabbed for it, but it was the Roadrunner that got to it first. Before Ryan and Carley could even turn around, he was next to Wile E. to politely return the dynamite to its rightful owner. He dropped it on Wile E.'s lap, gave his trademark "meep, meep" and sped off into the distance. Seeing how short the fuse had become, Wile E. didn't even attempt to get away from it. He merely held up a sign with a slanted exclamation point painted on, and waited for the dynamite to blow up in his face. He briefly held form, then proceeded to be reduced to a pile of ash (with his still-blinking eyes on top of said pile, of course.)

"Peh," Ryan scoffed. "Serves him right for pushing past us so rudely."

So, after having been in the house for several minutes, Ryan finally fully opened the door to the lab-like room.

It was immediately plainly obvious that the portal was allowing toons entry to the real world. Aside from the simple logic of recent events influencing the obviousness, it could also be seen that there was a tear in the portal wall, allowing a leak that toons could squeeze though. In fact, it actually resulted in a sucking vortex on the toon side.

It was easy to determine that it wasn't just an eye trick, considering that they had just seen two toons come out of the room, and considering that the top half of a toon was sticking through the gap as Ryan and Carley entered the room.

After a brief glance, both Ryan and Carley spoke at the same time.

"Yakko!"

"Boy, are we glad to see you!" said Ryan, beginning to walk towards the portal. "It sure would be great to have a helping hand with the situation here…"

At this time, Carley flipped the light switch, and it was revealed that the angle and poor lighting had lead to an eye trick after all, one that made them incorrectly identify the arriving toon as Yakko.

But it was someone that they were not willing to welcome with open arms.

A toon that brought a look of shock and fear to their faces.

Xakko.


	19. All You Need Is Blood

A/N: Just 3 chapters left! They are all written, except I may possibly toy with the ending a bit. And if my mind continues to remember, I may just post them 3 weeks in a row.

**All You Need Is Blood:**

"Well hello, _**friends**_," Xakko said with sarcastic malice. He used his right hand, already free from the portal, to pull out the rest of his left arm. He then put both hands on the outside edges of the portal and pushed with all he had in an attempt to free himself. Luckily for our protagonists, who have been named like 3246 times already, his attempts led to him running out of breath quite quickly.

"Phew," Xakko said. "I've…(gasp)…I've got to stop…(cough)…stop going to Wendy's so much."

"You know," Carley pointed out, "they do have salads there."

Ryan's big mouth got the best of him, and before he could stop himself, he spurted out, "oh, and how would you even know, little miss triple-cheeseburger combo?"

Needless to say, his face immediately went red and he covered his mouth like the speak-no-evil monkey. (((A/N: Clarification: I'm not saying Carley is fat, this was written way back when one time she told me she went to Wendy's and that's what she got.)))

For once, Ryan was happy that Xakko began to talk, since it probably saved him from serious injury.

"_Enough_ with the random ridiculous comments!" Xakko scorned. "At this rate, this story will _never_ get finished!"

"Story?" Carley asked no-one in particular.

Xakko continued as if she hadn't spoken. "Speaking of the story, I haven't even been in it yet! And without Dottie here to stop me, nor to even witness me doing it, that's a good enough reason for me to kill you both. Besides, it's, like, my only job. If I wasn't trying to kill you, I'd be unemployed."

"But this isn't a fanfic or something," Carley said. "It's real life!"

Xakko then broke the fourth wall: "Don't tell her. She might crack."

"Look, it may be real life, C," Ryan said, pausing to give a knowing glance to the audience, "but we do have toon elements to use. There's got to be a way to close this portal and stop Xakko from getting in."

Meanwhile, Xakko had gone back to work attempting to push himself out of the portal, and was now sweating profusely.

Carley and Ryan were hard at work thinking, scratching their chins. Suddenly, a light bulb appeared above Ryan's head.

"I have an idea!" Ryan said.

"Oh yeah!" Carley said. "With the toon rules in effect, we can just make stuff randomly appear! We can use that ability to our advantage!" She then grabbed the light bulb and threw it towards Xakko, narrowly missing him, eliciting much cursing and swearing from the villain.

"Oh," Ryan said, finally realizing that the light bulb Carley had thrown had come from above his head. "That's a much better idea than mine."

"What was your idea?"

"Just never you mind."

"Okkay, fair enough. Anyways, let's see how good I am at pulling objects out from behind my back."

So Carley gave it a try, while Xakko very slowly continued to edge his way out of the portal. Her first try wasn't very useful – a rubber ducky. Then she produced a microscope.

"Well," Ryan said. "At least we can bash him over the head with that if need be."

Xakko whimpered at the thought, and thus began pushing with newfound vigor, perhaps hoping to catch them off guard and in the process avoid a microscope bashing (((A/N: the bane of all arch-villains, I'm sure.)))

Carley's next attempt produced a large glass of iced tea, which Ryan promptly grabbed and started to chug. Luckily for Carley, she was able to generate another for herself, which she placed on a nearby counter for later consumption.

Reaching behind her back again, Carley finally felt what she had been attempting to find in the first place. She walked up to Xakko, pulled the object from behind her back, and pointed it at his face.

A gun? A knife? **Ha!** _No_, my friends, a _plunger_.

Making sure she had a firm grip, Carley stuck the plunger on Xakko's startled face and began to push.

Xakko's muffled voice could be heard through the plunger: "oh, _gross!_ This plunger _damn_ well better have not been used before!"

After about a minute of vigorous pushing, Carley had successfully managed to get Xakko back though the portal and onto the toon side.

Xakko obviously hadn't given up on his plan to infiltrate the real world; he was hitting the plunger with his fists from the other side. But, defying normal logic, the plunger held steady.

Ryan stared at the hole now plugged by the plunger. "Well, _that_ was an anticlimactic end to the chapter," he said.


	20. Reversal Of Fortune

**Reversal of Fortune:**

With the plunger plugging the hole, Ryan now had time to concentrate on determining what to do to correct the toon/reality situation. After a moment's thought, he came up with a possible solution: just cause the leak to work exactly in reverse.

Easier said than done, eh?

But Ryan knew who could help. Further consultation with Brain, identifying the recent events in reverse order, led to the formulation of a computer model (on Ryan's computer, with a link to the Brain) displaying what caused the leak and the resulting chaos.

Testing many different theoretical shot-in-the-dark educated guesses, Brain's work began to result in streams of what appeared to be rainbow-coloured fog slowly being drawn towards the portal. Different modulations drew a thicker fog.

Not knowing if these actions were affecting the toons, or something different, Ryan and Carley decided that it would probably be prudent to take steps to prevent themselves from being sucked into the portal. So they secured each other to chairs using the Handyman's Secret Weapon: duct tape. A string made of duct tape was also going to be attached to the handle of the plunger so it could be pulled out when the reverse process began in earnest, but Brain pointed out that since Carley had grabbed it from behind her back in a toonish fashion, it would simply be taken back as if it were toon material as well.

As Brain further perfected modulation, the plunger did indeed begin to wobble. Soon, the Roadrunner and a now-reassembled Wile E. Coyote were pulled into the room, the latter frantically grabbing at the floor with his claws, and the former attempting to run against the invisible force pulling them.

Ryan and Carley both yelled at the computer's microphone to alert Brain that there was now undeniable proof that the reverse vortex was working correctly. Of course two people yelling at the same time comes out something like, "JANILKASPJAFIDRUWILERCOUTE!"

Luckily, Brain was fairly sure he heard Wile E. Coyote mentioned in that mess. He transmitted a message using his microphone. "Did you just say that Wile E. Coyote has been sucked towards the portal?"

Ryan and Carley replied again, this time in better union, "YES!!"

Since the Warner sibs were in the same room as the Brain, they took the opportunity to display their ability to speak in unison much better, saying, "Hi Carley! Hi Ryan!" while Vakko mumbled vulgarities in the background. (((A/N: Wow, it's been a long time since any Warner characters have even briefly been in this story.)))

Carley said, "Hi!" back, while Ryan's identical greeting was delayed for 1.5 seconds due to having a straw in his mouth, suddenly feeling a need to take a sip of his iced tea.

In the meantime, Brain had begun to increase the power to the computer-based reverse vortex device (((A/N: I should have come up with a name for that…meh.)))

After a few seconds, the plunger finally slipped in, causing a sudden supreme increase in the sucking power. As Wile E. and the Roadrunner were sucked into the vortex, Ryan and Carley marveled at the fact that they did not appear to be affected at all. Unfortunately, their iced tea was, since Carley had pulled that out from behind her back. Luckily, the iced tea that they had already consumed didn't try to find a way out of their bodies and into the portal, because that would have just been gross.

For several minutes, toons and plot holes rushed by and into the portal. Then, as suddenly as the rush had started, it ended. Brain had certainly made sure that the events had gone perfectly in reverse, since the portal had actually repaired itself as soon as the vortex had completed its work.

"Now," the Brian said to Ryan, "I believe we have an arrangement to act upon. We previously agreed that upon completion of my services, you would write a fanfic story that may theoretically make me ruler of the world for fifteen days in my plane of existence."

"Yeah, I know," said Ryan. "I'll write that story…just as soon as I get this damn duct tape off of me."


	21. Story Within A Story

**Story Within A Story:**

Damn it took a long time to get that duct tape off of me.

Anyways, here I am. About to write a Pinky and the Brain fanfic, one that may cause Brain to become ruler of the (toon) world.

And I just realized that Carley, sitting next to me, has no realistic way home, due to the fact that she can't just bike there considering the plot holes were taken away. That's going to cost me a lot of money to get her home. Oy.

Alrighty, here it goes:

One day, Pinky found a red flashlight.

**Ryan says:** Brain, does Pinky suddenly have a red flashlight?

**Emperor Brain says:** Yes, but what does this have to do with anything? And how did you know he'd have one?

Then Pinky found half a Kit-Kat bar and some orange Tic-Tacs.

**Ryan says:** What does he have now?

**Emperor Brain says:** A Kit Kat and some Tic tacs.

**Ryan says:** Perfect. The theory that what I write in a fanfic happens in the toon world is accurate. I'll start that story for you now.

**Emperor Brain says:** Outstanding!

**Ryan says:** Nice sign-in name, by the way.

**Emperor Brain says:** I felt it was appropriate.

Anyways, here it really goes:

_**The Imperfect Drug, by Ryan F…I Mean WakkoRyan**_

Gather 'round kiddies, and I'll tell you the tale of how the Brain ruled the world for 15 days.

Once upon a time, Vakko was very angry. He had issues due to residual personality traits being left over from his mind-meld thingy with Xakko. Can you say "residual personality traits? I knew you could.

So Brain made a formula to make Vakko feel much better. He called it Lessangryide.

The Lessangryide worked so well that Brain marketed it to other people who had issues with residual effects left over from the combining of minds, or demonic possessions that were only partially exorcized.

The Lessangryide made people less angry, but some remained snobby jerks, like Vakko. Still, they stopped killing people so much, so that was a very good thing.

Because of the sales of Lessangryide, Brain became very rich. This made Brain very happy. It also made Pinky (his bestest friend in the whole wide world) very happy as well.

But Brain wanted to be happier. He knew he would be very happy if he took over the world.

Brain gave George W. Bush a lot of money so he would let Brain borrow his army to take over the rest of the world. Then Brain gave W. more money to let him be President. Then Brain renamed himself Emperor Brain.

But about two weeks after becoming the leader of the world, someone told the media that the Lessangryide was high-calorie!

Everyone was very mad at Brain for making them fatter, even though the Lessangryide was just a tiny pill with 100 calories. Brain knew he couldn't change the formulation or it would not be as effective. Everyone started suing Brain, so Brain didn't have enough money to rule the world anymore.

This made Brain very sad.

But at least Brain was happy that when he took over the world, the army had killed Osama bin Laden.

Vakko was willing to do more pushups to be able to lose the weight that the pill put on, so Brain kept making the Lessangryide for Vakko, because Brain is a man of his word. This made Vakko very happy, although he remained a snobby jerk.

After leaving the White House, Brain and his bestest friend in the whole world Pinky went back to Acme Labs and back to their cage.

After stepping in the cage, Brain turned to Pinky.

"We must get some sleep, Pinky. We'll need it for tomorrow night."

"Why? What are we doing tomorrow night?"

"The same thing we did every night until recently, Pinky..._try to take over the world!_

_**The End…of that Pinky & The Brain side-story**_


	22. Overtime

A/N: This is the last chapter!

Thanks so much for all of my readers, as few as there may be. And thanks for sticking with me for so long…it took me so long to do this story that I wrote it on 3 different computers in 4 different locations over more than 4 years!

**The Last Chapter Ever:**

"Well, that's it," Ryan said to Carley. "The end of what will likely be my last Animaniacs fanfiction. I should probably end this off in a big way."

"Yes," Carley said. "You probably should."

_**The Actual End.**_


End file.
